Sunday, October 14, 2007

Roles of gods in modern world

Brahma
Systems Installation


Vishnu
Systems Administration & Support


Lakshmi
Finance and Accounts consultant


Saraswati
Training and Knowledge Management


Shiva
DBA (Crash Specialist)


Ganesh
Quality Assuarance & Documentation


Narada
Data transfer


Yama
Reorganization & Downsizing Consultant


Chitragupta
IDP & Personal Records


Apsaras
Downloadable Viruses


Devas
Mainframe Programmers


Surya
Solaris Administrator


Rakshasas
In house Hackers


Ravan
Internet Explorer WWWF


Kumbhakarna
Zombie Process


Lakshman
Support Software and Backup


Hanuman
Linux/s390


Vaali
MS Windows


Sugreeva
DOS


Jatayu
Firewall


Dronacharya
System Programmer


Vishwamitra
Sr. Manager Projects


Shakuni
Annual appraisal & Promotion


Valmiki
Technical Writer (Ramayana Sign off document)


Krishna
SDLC ( Sudarshan Wheel Development Life Cycle )


Dharmaraj Yudhishthira
ISO Consultant (CMM level 5)


Arjun
Lead Programmer (all companies are vying for him)


Abhimanyu
Trainee Programmer


Draupadi
Motivation & Team building


Bhima
MAINFRAME LEGACY SYSTEM


Duryodhana
Microsoft product Written in VB


Karna
Contract programmer


Dhrutarashtra
Visual C++


Gandhari
Dreamweaver


100 Kauravas
Microsoft Service Packs and patches

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Call these a law

Strange Sex Laws:
  • In the quiet town of Connorsville, Wisconsin, it's illegal for a man to shoot off a gun when his female partner has an orgasm.

  • It's against the law in Willowdale, Oregon, for a husband to curse during sex.

  • In Oblong, Illinois, it's punishable by law to make love while hunting or fishing on your wedding day.

  • Pennsylvania bans oral sex while wearing low quality brands of lipstick. It has been determined that low quality lipstick is a cause for penis cancer.

  • No man is allowed to make love to his wife with the smell of garlic, onions, or sardines on his breath in Alexandria, Minnesota. If his wife so requests, law mandates that he must brush his teeth.

  • Warn your hubby that after lovemaking in Ames, Iowa, he isn't allowed to take more than three gulps of beer while lying in bed with you -- or holding you in his arms.

  • Bozeman, Montana, has a law that bans all sexual activity between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a home after sundown-- if they're nude. (Apparently, if you wear socks, you're safe from the law!)

  • In hotels in Sioux Falls, South Dakota, every room is required to have twin beds. And the beds must be a minimum of two feet apart when a couple rents a room for only one night. And it's illegal to make love on the floor between the beds!

  • The owner of every hotel in Hastings, Nebraska, is required to provide each guest with a clean and pressed nightshirt. No couple, even if they are married, may sleep together in the nude. Nor may they have sex unless they are wearing one of these clean, white cotton nightshirts.

  • An ordinance in Newcastle, Wyoming, specifically bans couples from having sex while standing inside a store's walk-in meat freezer!

  • A state law in Illinois mandates that all bachelors should be called master, not mister, when addressed by their female counterparts.

  • In Norfolk, Virginia, a woman can't go out without wearing a corset. (There was a civil-service job-- for men only-- called a corset inspector.)

  • However, in Merryville, Missouri, women are prohibited from wearing corsets because "the privilege of admiring the curvaceous, unencumbered body of a young woman should not be denied to the normal, red-blooded American male."

  • It's safe to make love while parked in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho. Police officers aren't allowed to walk up and knock on the window. Any suspicious officer who thinks that sex is taking place must drive up from behind, honk his horn three times and wait approximately two minutes before getting out of his car to investigate.

  • Another law in Helena, Montana, mandates that a woman can't dance on a table in a saloon or bar unless she has on at least three pounds, two ounces of clothing.

  • Lovers in Liberty Corner, New Jersey, should avoid satisfying their lustful urges in a parked car. If the horn accidentally sounds while they are frolicking behind the wheel, the couple can face a jail term.

  • In Carlsbad, New Mexico, it's legal for couples to have sex in a parked vehicle during their lunch break from work, as long as the car or van has curtains to stop strangers from peeking in.

  • A Florida sex law: If you're a single, divorced or widowed woman, you can't parachute on Sunday afternoons.

  • Women aren't allowed to wear patent-leather shoes in Cleveland, Ohio-- a man might see the reflection of something "he oughtn't"

  • No woman may have sex with a man while riding in an ambulance within the boundaries of Tremonton, Utah. If caught, the woman can be charged with a sexual misdemeanor and "her name is to be published in the local newspaper." The man isn't charged nor is his name revealed.